Corrupt a Wish!

Granted, she gets a girlfriend.

I wish season three started forty five minutes ago instead of in a week.

Granted, but you missed it and they never air it again (even on youtube)

I wish the final .mov would come out.

Granted, but it sucks.

I wish my college essays were done and brilliantly written.

Granted, but you are still rejected by every college.

I wish I knew where I was going to be in a year.

Granted: a hobo.

I wish I could make money by crocheting

Granted, but you start to hate crocheting when you do it for monetary gain.

I wish I could play mafia for money.

Granted, but you only get paid when you win...and you never win.

I wish our mafia island existed.

Granted, but it's infested with bears and li-ligers.

I wish I had the ability and resources to make this really cool product I thought of.

Granted, but you don't have the time.

I wish I could become a successful professional tennis player.

Granted, but you aren't the best so I play you and win making you look foolish. You get so upset you break your racket and stomp off the court embarrassing everyone around you. Then you quit.

I wish it was Christmas break already.

Granted, but it's the last day of Christmas break.

I wish people would stop corrupting my wishes.

Granted, but you wish for stupid things so your life sucks anyway.

I wish I could go into space.

Granted, but without a spacesuit and you die.

I wish I could make technology work perfectly just by touching it.

Granted, but you are forced to be separated from all technology.

I wish I could do a backflip

Granted, but only when you are by yourself, so no one ever believes you.

I wish I was still in gymnastics.

Granted, but it's a preschool class.

I wish I was better at telling jokes.

Granted. You are now the knock-knock joke expert of Mafia Online.

I wish that UO beats USC today.

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Granted.
Granted who?
Granted, but I have no idea what kind of thing they're trying to beat each other at so I'm just going to say it's ping pong and they both suck at ping pong, so it's no great victory.

I wish I had a photographic memory.

Granted. You know will remember graphically all the gross things, and forget most other things.

I wish that UO beats USC at their football game today.

Granted, but they're just letters playing an imaginary game of football in my mind.

I wish that I had a photographic memory that only remembered what I wanted it to.

Granted, but you can only remember one thing at a time.

I wish I could date Tom Hiddleston.

Granted, but he's not dating you.

I wish I could make my own TV show.

Granted, but it sucks and no one watches it. Even your mother hates it.

I wish I could turn into any animal I wanted.

Granted, but you can't change back.

I wish I could conjure apples out of thin air.

Granted, but they're rotten.

I wish I could be famous.